A post should appear every Sunday

Sunday November 5th 2023

All kinds of horrible things have been done to me this week. You won’t believe the cruelty I’ve been subjected to, or how cynically I’ve been exploited.

It all begins on Monday when Human’s friend Rashmeeta – she used to be my friend as well, but not any more – leaves a present for me while I am out on my walk.

Human is pleased: she pats me and puts the present by my nose. It doesn’t smell dangerous, so I think nothing of it.

Little do I guess that it’s a Pet Teezer, a de-tangling brush especially designed to ‘remove loose hairs and de-shed even thick, thermal undercoats.’

And a few days later, while I’m resting innocently on the day bed, I feel something tugging at my beautiful, warm undercoat. I squirm and make my coat ripple. You’d think that would be enough of a hint, wouldn’t you? But no, the tugging continues.

I’m forced to bare my teeth and utter one or two subdued growls, but she ignores me. Then I recognise the smell. It’s that damn so called present.

Before I can escape to my dog bed, I can smell a huge heap of my beautiful undercoat resting on the coffee table.

You can see how huge the pile is if you look at that AA battery next to it.

I’m very upset. And because I growled, I don’t even get a treat.

She holds my thermals in her hands. The cheek. She puts them in the kitchen. Over the next few days she keeps lifting them and cooing about how amazingly warm they are. And you’ll never guess what she does next – she brings down a pair of trainer socks, and stuffs my lovely fluff into them. Then she puts another pair of socks over the top and swans off to bed!

Theft, there’s no other word for it. So she’ll be warm in bed. Great. But what about me?

I can hardly contain my indignation.

She’s so busy looking after herself that she doesn’t notice my suffering. It takes me days of grunting, attacking my bottom and nipping out chunks of my coat before it finally dawns on the silly fool that my anal glands are troubling me.

I was only hoping for sympathy, but no, she’s always one for extremes, so she books us in at the vet’s. Shudder.

On Thursday, Human goes out and leaves me at home all morning. She’s in a foul mood when she gets back. Apparently she fell into a huge puddle in the Dental Hospital car park before she saw the dentist! Snigger.

So she takes it out on me. She runs the clippers all around my bottom and thighs. She says I’m so hairy that the veterinary nurse won’t be able to locate my bottom, let alone my anal glands. Humans can be so rude. I don’t like the clippers, so I tremble until she stops – that always makes her feel guilty, so I get a treat when she’s finished.

Anyway, after we’ve had a walk, off we go to the vet’s. We see that nice nurse, the one I’ve  known for a long time.

But even she has it in for me, because as soon as my glands are done, she begins clipping my nails. I hate my nails being touched.

I’m completely defenceless. I try to bite the veterinary nurse, but I can’t manage to jerk my head out of Human’s grip. Then she nicks the quick of one of my nails. I don’t make a sound. I never squeak when I’m hurt. But I damn well turn up the growling to ferocity level.

My blood drips onto the floor and makes little pools by my feet. How could your human, who is supposed to look after you, allow this to happen?

Oh Dog, what can I do to protect myself?

After another miserable day – well, I’m sure it must have been a miserable day – I get my answer.

On Saturday something wonderful happens. My prayers are answered.It’s nearly the end of our walk when we meet Jane and Martha. You may know Martha as she’s featured on my blog before. She’s only small and she’s older than me, so when she’s tired she hops onto her human’s disability scooter.

Recently she was attacked by a nasty dog. It’s happened to her before.

But I don’t think it’ll happen again, because she’s got protection …………..

No dog is going to mess with her now, nor is any human.

Brilliant!

I’m definitely getting a coat like that.

Isis came from Aeza cat and dog rescue in Aljezur, Portugal. For information about adopting an animal from the centre, contact kerry@azea.org or go to http://www.dogwatch.co.uk.