And whose fault was it that the images of Wilda were not appearing on gmail last night? Yes, mine, of course. Today I discover my phone won’t send messages either. I’ve accidentally switched it to flight mode.

Must be the anaesthetic.

Posting days: Sunday and Wednesday and, sometimes, maybe, extra bits in between.

Thursday August 16th 2018 (Just pretend it’s Wednesday.)

Remember the lovely Wilda? She with the two inch long eyelashes? She who was the ring bearer at J. and L.’s wedding?

If you do, then you will be as aghast as I am when I meet the disgraced one in Kings Heath Park.

I am just congratulating Isis on how beautifully she is walking on her lead, and there they are by the cafe area: J, baby M, just over a year old, and little Wilda who is wagging her tail off at my feet in expectation of a gravy bone.

But dear, oh dear, oh dear, what’s this?

Poor little Wilda. What has she done to deserve such barbarism?

Since baby M. became mobile, explains J., Wilda has turned into a terrible scavenger. After much practice following M. around the house and gobbling up bits of dropped biscuit, she graduates to picking up nasty things in the park and up-chucking them at home.

Dogs have such endearing habits.

On this particular day, J. reaches the end of her tether. Naughty Wilda, having enjoyed some unspeakable snacks in the park, comes into the house and promptly vomits all over the carpet.

Scarcely has poor J. cleaned up after Wilda when baby M. poos copiously close by and also, naturally, on the carpet

During her pregnancy, J. had looked forward to the joys of motherhood and spending halcyon days at home with baby and Wilda.

“But it’s not the glamorous life I imagined”, she sighs.

Like Popeye the Sailor Man, this is all she can stand and she can’t stand no more.

Next day she stops off at the pet shop and buys a muzzle.

But J is too kind-hearted to deprive Wilda of her gravy bone, and removes the muzzle so that the naughty little creature can eat her treat.

Isis came from the Aeza cat and dog rescue and adoption centre in Aljezur, Portugal. For information about adopting an animal from the centre, contact kerry@aeza.org or  www.dogwatchuk.co.uk