Posting days: Sunday and Wednesday and, sometimes, maybe, extra bits in between.
Thursday (should have been Wednesday) August 29th 2018
Isis: It should have been bloody Tuesday.
Isis: Well, I ask you. Tuesday was supposed to be my big day.
Human: Yes, I know, but ……
Isis: But nothing. It was my GOTCHA day.
Human: Yes, I know. I’m sorry but ……
Isis: Yes, you made a mistake. You thought my gotcha day was August 29th.
Human: Yes, I know, I’m sorry but ……
Isis: Yes, you didn’t check because you knew you were right.
Human: Yes, I know. I’m very sorry Isis.
Isis: And as if that wasn’t bad enough, you didn’t even celebrate my Very Important Day on the wrong day. You didn’t even celebrate it two days late, on the 29th.
Human: Have a heart, Isis. I was ill.
Isis: That was your fault. You were doing drugs. Daisy told me. You know they made you ill before.
Human: They were pain killers, Isis.
Isis: Daisy told me you were doing drugs.
Human: Cats get things wrong sometimes.
Isis: No they don’t. Cats know everything. Daisy told me.
She’s cross with you as well. Why did you do them?
Human: My shoulder hurt.
Isis: Was it bad?
Human: Very bad.
Isis: Was it as bad as when I got sticks stuck in my mouth?
Human: It hurt more than when you got sticks stuck in your mouth.
Isis: All right then. But Daisy’s cross with you for forgetting my Gotcha day. That’s why she pooed on the floor while you were being sick.
Human: I don’t think so. It was just malice.
Isis: Who’s Alice.
Human: Never mind. It doesn’t matter. On Sunday our blog will be all about you. I’ll say what a sweet, clever little dog you are and I’ll take a lovely photo of you looking beautiful.
Isis: (somewhat mollified): Oh. All right then.
Human: And before I take the photo, I’ll brush you and comb you so you’ll look really stunning.
Isis: €ζø*! !℘!
Isis came from the Aeza cat and dog rescue and adoption centre in Aljezur, Portugal. For information about adopting an animal from the centre, contact email@example.com or www.dogwatchuk.co.uk