Posting days: Sunday and Wednesday and, sometimes, maybe, extra bits in between.

Wednesday November 29th 2018

It’s all your fault, Isis.

Human has to set her alarm for 6.30 a.m. on Wednesdays so that she can take you to the park before she sets off for her art group.

Inevitably, of course, she then stays awake most of the night telling herself she must go to sleep soon because she has to rise obscenely early next morning.

When the alarm goes off, she puts one foot out of the bed to fool herself that she really is about to get up. Before she knows it, she’s lurching towards the clock trying to convince herself that it isn’t 7.00 a.m. yet.

It is.

Oh my dog! ****, **** and even more ****.

After the briefest of ablutions, she staggers downstairs, grabs your collar from the cupboard doorknob and staggers into the back room where you are deeply asleep.

A hand placed for a few seconds under your nose is all it takes for you to awake in a warm fluffiness of delight.

Unlike Human, you’re thrilled to be woken up so early.

A walk! Oh joy!

Ecstatic, you prance to the front door. Somnambulant, Human stumbles behind you.

In the porch you buck and twirl as she struggles to wrap your harness around your silky, slippery neck.

“Please don’t bark in my ear. Not this morning. It’s all too much for me.”

“BWOWWOWWOWWOWWOW .. YERRRRAPPP .. WOO HOO HOO HOO WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Thanks a million Isis.

Isis came from the Aeza cat and dog rescue and adoption centre in Aljezur, Portugal. For information about adopting an animal from the centre, contact kerry@aeza.org or  www.dogwatchuk.co.uk